Ngũgĩ wa Thiong’o: A Giant of African Writing

MEN NEVER PAY ATTENTION… "To women issues"

In a Local Hospital, a gentleman made several attempts
to get into the men's restroom, but it was always occupied.

A nurse noticed his tight spot, and approached him.
"Sir," she reached out, "You may use the ladies room,
if you promise not to touch any of the [Buttons] on the wall."

He obliged and did what he needed to,
but as he sat there occupied with relief,
he noticed the buttons he had promised not to touch.
Each button was Identified by letters:
[WW], [WA], [PP] and a red one labeled [ATR]...
And so he thought, “who would know if I touched them?”

He couldn't resist... He sheepishly pushed [WW]...
Without delay, [Warm Water] started spraying gently upon his bottom.
‘Gush’! What a nice feeling, he thought.
“Men's restrooms don't have nice things like this.”
Looking forward to more pleasure, he pushed the [WA] button…
[Warm Air] replaced the Warm Water, gently drying his underside.
When this stopped, he at once pushed the [PP] button.
A large [Powder Puff] caressed his bottom
adding a fragile scent of spring flower to this amazing pleasure.
The ladies restroom was more than a restroom; wow!
It is tender loving pleasurable, he felt!

When the powder puff completed its function,
he couldn't wait to push the red ATR button
which by now he expected supreme ecstasy - {*/o\@#!-}

Next thing when he was opening his eyes,
he was in a hospital bed, and a nurse was staring down at him.

"WHAT happened?" The nurse inquired….
she asked “what do you remember?”
The man dizzily recalled…
"The last thing I remember was pushing the red ATR button."

"Oow no!” The nurse expressed sympathy.
“The button A.T.R. is an AUTOMATIC TAMPON REMOVER!
So sorry… your ‘Thing’ is under your pillow."
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